Why Facing Your Fears at Keeners is Important by Sila Griffin

While facing your fears in general is an important thing to practice, at Keeners is it crucial. It is so crucial because to progress in this program I had to push my self out of my comfort zone every single day in order to both get better at kayaking and grow as a person. Our first day on the water this session seemed incredibly huge and scary to me and the rapids were a lot bigger than anything I had ever run before so I was really nervous. However, I convinced myself to not walk anything and I am forever grateful that I made that choice. By pushing myself out of my comfort zone and running scary, but safe rapids in a safe, controlled environment, I progressed a lot in both skill and confidence. What seemed huge and scary the first day gets less and less terrifying every single time I run it, my whole perspective on what is “sketchy” has changed dramatically. Keeners builds a perfect environment of both support if you choose not to run a rapid but also encouragement if you choose to run it, letting Keeners do challenge by choice. While it is a choice whether to push out of yourself out of your comfort zone, it is important to choose to do so. Over the last two weeks that I have gotten the privilege to spend at the Keener program, I realized that you get out of it what you put in. The more a Keener pushes themselves throughout the three weeks the more they progress as both a kayaker and a young adult.

Corner Wave by Zander Capozzi

Corner wave is one of the most interesting waves of the river. It’s bouncy it’s fun, but it’s also extremely diagonal which leads to constant issues of staying on it retaining tricks. One moment is this the best way on the river easy to catch easy to ride and you can land every trick, the next nothing. Making one of the most dynamic and interesting waves on the river and one of the most fun. With waves ranging from easy to incredibly difficult to catch and from easy to throw to easily one of the hardest to throw on. Corner wave sit squarely in the middle a middle ground of fun and awesomeness at about 4 foot.

New Line on the Block by Jackson Gratz

As many a keener knows, Garvens is one of the more technical and challenging rapids on the Ottowa. With lots of line choices across various difficulties, theres no wonder why it’s become a fan favorite. Many have tried to come up with new lines in the past, but one recent take on Dragons Tongue has all the keeners talking. The newly dubbed “Frenchie Line” named by Lucas Rodrig, is not one for the faint of heart. By being inside the curler and going exactly where Stephen Wright said not to go, you too can run this line. Unfortunately, this curler leads the non-boofing intrepid paddler into a plug that can make a boat disappear for a few seconds, and could potentially push you into the cave under Dragons Tongue. This probably won’t happen so you should run it with Stephen’s ok. P.S. don’t run this line on your head, it would probably hurt.

The Dangers of Walmart by Jacob Zivony

When I came to keeners, I was expecting to be underfed because I’m kayaking all the time and I would have an insatiable appetite, and I was… until I went to Walmart. When we first went to Walmart I was certainly not expecting to spend much. Becca gave us 20 minutes inside the store so we were rushing. When we first went in it was like on of those videos of shoppers in Black Friday in like 2005. We were rushing to put everything we could in our cart. I did not think that the total would add up to 92 CAD. After I checked out we had to take our stuff back in the bus and that thing was NOT equipped to handle all our precious cargo. After we got back while keeping all our food under our feet and in our laps we sorted it out and completely filled all our food storage and even had it overflow in to Istanbul. The next day I had a BIG breakfast, and I mean BIG. I had so many eggos and muffins I was going to throw up. I ended up being not hungry for like 3 days after Walmart because I ate so much food. If you’re an incoming keener beware of the Walmart deception because you might just end up unable to eat anything after.

How to Have a Perfect Walmart Run by Bennett Whalen

To have a successful Walmart run you will need to think ahead. There is twenty minutes were you need to find everything you will need for the next two weeks. After you know what you want when arriving you need to go to the most important thing on your list of items, then go down to the least important. Now that you have everything go to the self checkout to avoid the lines. Scan your items and make sure your card doesn’t decline. Now get back to the front door with with one minute to spare. That is how you do a successful Walmart run.

A Keener's Daily Routine by Owen Hartley

First, wake up at 7:45. Second, do a fun morning activity. Third, return to your cabin and make breakfast. Fourth, clean the dishes, bathrooms, bedrooms, and common areas. Fifth, go to the Thunderdome for a briefing on the day's activities. Sixth, get dressed and ready for kayaking. Seventh, slide down the hill into the lake with your kayak. Eighth, do a quick warm-up and skill session on the lake. Ninth, start paddling down the river. Tenth, stop for lunch at a nice rocky beach. Eleventh, devour your lunch and drink plenty of water. Twelfth, continue paddling down the river and have a great time. Thirteenth, take out at the bottom of the river and load the trailer. Fourteenth, drive to Keenerville and get dressed for dinner. Fifteenth, go to dinner and enjoy your meal. Sixteenth, play volleyball, then head back to Keenerville. Seventeenth, participate in a fun evening activity. Finally, get a nice, long night's rest

Keenervision by Charlie Woodward

The thunderdome tv is one of the most divisive objects in all of keenerville, some might say in Ontario as a whole. Keeners spend quite a bit of time in the thunderdome after their long days of paddling on the Ottawa and often use the tv as a way to wind down. The problem is, there are 20 keeners in 2026 session 1 and only one tv, now I’m sure you can see how this could be a problem. Some keeners want to watch kayaking movies and clips while others want to watch a movie or show during that time and often little conflicts arise because of the disagreement. The ironic bit about it is that when something to watch is put on 90% of the group ends up scrolling on their phones through the whole thing anyways. Makes it seem a little bit pointless but in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t really matter.

White House by Kyan Vigoda

I have been in White House for two years in the top bunk of the first room. There are three rooms down the hallway, the first being on the left, the second on the right, and the third on the left. The bathroom is at the end of the hallway. When you enter through the main doorway, there are 3 couches on the left facing the tv, and a kitchen on the far war next to the fridge on the right. The other door exits into the storage room, which is off limits, that has a convenient exit to the field in front of White House for morning activity or to make it on time to the bus. Last year our hot water smelled like sulfur but this has been fixed this year. A lot of people like to hang their hammocks in front of the porch as well, and they usually let me use them.

Trip to Town by Tyler Goldstein

On the second Tuesday of keeners we took a big trip to Renfrew. All twenty keeners plus Sofia, stevo’s nanny, Becca, Aaron, David, and Chantelle packed into the kayaking bus and drove to town. Once we arrived in the small Canadian town of Renfrew we split into to groups: one went to Walmart and one went to A and W. I was in the Walmart group. Charlie and I got a bunch of chips, ramen, and other snacks for the last week and a half at Keenerville. After we swapped and got food at the restaurant. Our next stop was the movie theater. We watched a movie called disclosure day. It is a speilburg movie about aliens 👽 which was odd to say the least. There was a tornado and the power turned off in the middle. On the way back to keenerville, we ran over a tree and it was a pretty good night.

Why Yakistan Always has the Best Breakfast by Callan Fox

Being a girl at Keeners is definitely a slightly different experience than being a boy. This session, I am one of only two official female Keeners, plus we have Sofia (who is nannying for Baby but living with us in Yakistan). Although we are the overwhelming minority, we have the advantage of a calm kitchen with an abundance of food. We have certainly utilized this privilege. We collectively decided that we need to make the most gourmet and original foods possible. This started with delicious chocolate chip pancakes with eggs and bacon, but quickly progressed into extremely thin brownies due the lack of baking pans in our small kitchen and a veggie and chicken scramble. Soon, everyone realized how much we were excelling in our kitchen and started contacting us privately to devour some of our creations. Whether it was eggs, crepes adorned with berries, or freshly made pasta, we began pawning off some of our sacred creations for new ingredients. The other day, we went to Walmart to up our cooking game. So, we bought an abundance of food (and even more Red Bull) to make new creations like my chocolate covered cake balls and ramen with eggs. All in all, Yakistan had and will always have the best food because it has the most care with the least chaos.

How to Make the Best Keener Breakfast by Nora Crabb

Yakistan does very very good at breakfast time. Callan and I work very well at collaborating in the kitchen and coming up with new ideas for fantastic breakfasts. My favorite breakfast yet, has been when we make our signature Reese’s peanut butter cup, chocolate chip pancakes. I’ll do a quick step by step on how to make them. #1 put pancake mix into a bowl #2 add water as needed #3 add the chocolate chips (preferably a lot) #4 cook 4 plain chocolate chip pancakes for Sofia cause she doesn’t like peanut butter…. (Somehow) #5 add a ton of mini peanut butter cups to the remaining pancake mix #6 cook 4 more BIG pancakes with the better batter (During all this, callan is cooking an amazing egg scramble) #7 put your pancakes on the plate and spread Nutella on them #8 ENJOY THE BEST BREAKFAST EVER!

Days at Wilderness Tours by Cian Bergin

The day starts at 7:30 in the morning when Aaron wakes me up. I sit up and get ready for my day. I eat eggs and toast while thinking about what i could be doing today. I am going to be shadowing a raft guide for the first time and i am excited to see what it is like to work for Wilderness Tours. At 8:30 joe pulls in to the driveway i hope in the car and we are off. He drops me off at the put in for the day. I hoped on a raft with a guide named Jackson. We paddled down the middle channel I learned a lot about rafting and how to guide rafting is very team oriented. I finished off my day working at the put in loading and unloading boats along with doing boat repairs. I am very grateful to have had this experience and had a wonderful time.

Breakfast by Lucas Rodrigue

I think the best way to make breakfast if you only have 2 eggs and 2 toast is to first put the toast in the toaster. Then you crack the eggs in a pan and cook them. I like scrambled eggs because there easy to make and they taste good. While the eggs are cooking the toast will probably be done. Then you can put some butter on the toast if you have any. After that you put the eggs on the toast or eat them on the side. It dont take very long and its really easy. Even if you dont have alot of food its still a good breakfast because eggs got protein and toast gives you energy. I would eat this before school because it fills you up and its better then skipping breakfast. I think this is the best breakfast you can make with only 2 eggs and 2 toast because it’s simple, tastes good, and anybody can make it without needing lots of stuff. Also Jackson is my hero and he is a super awesome genius kayaker.

The Most Vital Resource by Owen Hartley

Nutella is one of the most important resources at Keeners. Some would even argue that it is more important than a helmet, PFD, spray skirt, or paddle. To understand the importance of Nutella, you have to take a step back and use your imagination. Imagine eating either eggs or plain toast every day for three weeks. Your only hope of spicing up your breakfast is jelly—which Zander already ate all of—or Nutella. Now you can see why Nutella is so important. However, some people take it for granted and spread inch-thick layers onto a single piece of toast. In summary, if you come to Keeners, don't eat all the Nutella unless you want to be hated.

My Home River by Will Gillespie

My home river is called the Clutha. Its a wide flat river. The part that I paddle on is a slalom course because I paddle slalom. The nearest big water river that I paddle is called the the Roaring Meg. It is part of the Kawarau Gorge near Queenstown. It is definitely not as big as the Ottawa but it still has a few big rapids. There is one part that sticks in my mind is a rapid where that water comes around a corner, across a bit the smashes in the a flat rock wall. There a big hole that you don't want to get stuck in and then a few big rapids as well. There is a beginner tradition where you have to jump off a 15ish meter tall rock. I really enjoy these rivers and love NZ.

How to Make a Whitehouse Breakfast by Sila Griffin

Step 1: Cook two Eggos in the toaster. Step 2: Cook some juicy bacon up in a pan. Step 3: Offer someone bacon and in return they have to do the dishes to minimize your work. Step 4: Cook two sunny-side up eggs with salt and pepper on them. Step 5: Take your food off of the pan and out of the toaster before it starts smoking and the fire alarm goes off. Step 6: Put an Eggo on a plate and lay your eggs and bacon on top of that Eggo before closing off your breakfast sandwich with your second Eggo. Step 7: Enjoy your food and protect it from your greedy cabin mates around you.

Beatdown Thursday by Zander Capozzi

Thursdays might be the most iconic day at Keener’s. It’s beat down Thursday. A day where we purposely find big water and big holes to desensitize ourselves to big water and go straight into them. Leading to some of the most legendary moments of our keener experience. This first Thursday was one to remember with several legendary beat downs and some equally legendary photos. See below. Then later, we came back with a floaty and went straight into the hole. Getting an absolutely worked.

I Promise I did not Eat your Protein Bars by Kai Stowers

I promise I did not eat your protein bars. If I did, I would've eaten the whole thing, not just taken tiny little bites out of it. I'm honestly surprised it took you this long to realize that we're not actually alone in Istanbul. There's definitely something else living below us or maybe inside with us. You should probably start watching your back... and your food. Every time we leave for even a few minutes or look away, these 2 little squirrels show up running around helping themselves to whatever snacks they can find. usually the chocolate protein bars. It doesn't even have the decency to steal the whole thing. It just takes one or two bites and leaves the evidence behind, making it look like one of us did it. It's honestly kind of smart, which is almost impressive if it wasn't so annoying. The squirrels aren’t the only things living with us. once lights out hits we have a zoo of bugs flying all around. i made friends with a little deer tick. he liked me so much he tried to live inside me. Thats when i had to cut the line. He’s gone now, along with my Lyme disease cause i took some pills that costed too much cause i’m in canada. not complaining because i’m in Canada! Keeners is a dream come true and i love everything about it. 

The Apple Juice Mystery by Evan Cassidy

Life at whitewater kayaking camp has been full of excitement, adventure. However, one event has managed to capture everyone’s attention more than any rapid we’ve paddled so far the disappearance of our cabin’s apple juice. It all started when we returned from a long day on the river. Everyone was tired, and looking forward to a drink since we just got our food stocked . When someone opened the refrigerator ,we discovered a shocking sight. The apple juice was completely gone we suspect that somebody chugged it . At first, nobody knew what had happened. Theories spread quickly throughout the cabin. Others suggested that perhaps it was accidentally thrown out. Or just eaten by the White House’s refrigerator, although on the end, it was all blamed on one person, but we will never know for sure unless the evidence is found Of course, the most likely explanation is that someone in our cabin enjoyed a little more apple juice than the rest of us. Despite several investigations and many accusations made, the identity of the apple juice chugger remains a mystery. While the missing juice may never be recovered, The residence of White House will remember the apple juice incident for at least a week and then probably forget, the end.

To Catch a Firefly by Charlie Woodward

Picture this, a group of keeners are sitting in the thunderdome watching the World Cup. It’s getting darker, the sun begins to set on the Ottawa river turning the dark brown to black. This means two things: curfew is soon and we would have to return to our cabins, and the fireflies begin to come out. Our attention was ripped from the TV when we noticed small flashes of light at the base of the trees on the edge of keenerville. We jumped up out of our seats and grabbed a Nalgene which would become a fireflies prison soon enough. We headed to the field near White House and carefully scanned the grass for the fleeting bursts of light we were searching for. We spied one and attempted to scoop it into the water bottle. It took a few attempts but we finally had the little orb of brilliance trapped. We gazed into the bottle while it flitted around before we opened the lid and let it float back into the wild.

How to Win Best Beatdown When it’s not Beatdown Day by Callan Fox

Step 1: Go on the Middle channel on day 2. Step 2: Get out to scout Iron Ring and realize that it looks very swirly. Step 3: Decide that you need redemption from when you ran it at a high level last year, where you got stuck in the Room of Doom and had to get help getting out of your boat. Step 4: Volunteer to run the rapid second and walk up. You are going to face your fears. Step 5: Run the rapid with a little less momentum than you meant to get. Flip after you hit the foam pile and get sent into the room of doom. Roll up in your second try, only to be sent way up into the eddy. Step 6: back ender in the eddy and get pinned upside down on the rocks. Realize you won’t really be able to roll, so pull your skirt. Step 7: Immediately get sent down into the depths of the Iron Ring boils. Keep hold of your paddle because that would be tragic to lose. Step 8: Hit the bottom of the river, something you did not know was possible. Start to panic because you can’t hold your breath any longer. Step 9: Finally resurface, way far downstream. Gasp for air and swim as hard as you can. Step 10: Profusely thank everyone who helped with you and all of your gear. Step 11: Never forget this experience. Everyone will remind you.

Analysis of Keener Airborne Transport Vehicle by Holden Constantino

Previous commentary by Isaac Sinton-Remes proposed, and ultimately rejected, a Keenerpult capable of launching a 75kg mass approximately 250m. This paper reevaluates that task and proposes a solution. The Keenerpult model ignored air resistance. Though this eases the calculations required for a trebuchet as proposed by Isaac, it fails to consider the benefits of a gliding vehicle. Even a vehicle with a 1.5:1 glide ratio, with initial altitude of 25m, and initial distance of 50m (to account for launch; which will be explained later) can glide 37.5m on descent, compared to <= 25m on a typical ballistic trajectory. Therefore, a glide vehicle alleviates some of the problems with a trebuchet. The KATV program operates on a tight budget, so the design of the glide vehicle is simple. We may simply take a half-slice (being reasonably light and aerodynamic), add a pair of fixed wings for lift, with elevons and rudder on the rear. One notes that roll is controlled entirely by the tailplane. A canopy is to be erected over the cockpit. The pilot will not therefore need a PFD, skirt, or helmet. If the pilot is 60kg, the boat is 20kg, and the modifications are 30kg, this comes to 110kg. Self-propulsion is discussed later, but even then this glider is not able to take off unassisted. A jet sled seems most practical. The Keener bus can be dismantled (if it has not already been unintentionally), the engine removed to the rear, and connected to a large fan. The cabin will be removed entirely, and the remaining chassis can be placed on rails. A hollow drum, terminating in a frustum or cone, can be placed behind the propeller. The kayak is mounted forwards of the engine for launch. During launch, the engine is started and spun up. Once reaching full power, the drum of kerosene fuel conveniently placed above the engine is vented into the cylinder by the propellor and ignited. This creates a primitive jet engine. After this engine reaches full power, the cart is released up the inclined track and the kayak released. If the cart at release weighs 1500kg, burns through 150kg of fuel, and accelerates exhaust at 1000m/s, the cart can accelerate up to 140 m/s or so. 100m/s seems a likely target, considering drag and friction. This mechanism could probably launch the kayak, but it would not get far. The final element of this system is to attach a motor and propeller to the stern of the kayak. This is to be used to allow the kayak to maintain flight and climb. After consideration of a KATV system, this is found to be practicable. I propose the immediate construction of this system.

How to Run McCoys Rapid by Kyan Vigoda

There are 5 main lines on Mccoys rapid: left sneak, right sneak, right boof, Saettlers, and Phil’s tongue. Left sneak is on the far left shore and goes around a secluded corner. It is an extremely easy line but does become very rocky or unrunnable at lower water. Right sneak and right boof are on the right shore with sneak directly along the shore and boof a foot or two out. These lines are fairly easy and are good for kayakers less comfortable with the rapid. To run Saettlers paddle hard over or through Saettlers hole and try to end up towards football eddy and away from Phil’s. Phil’s tongue is between both sides of Phil’s hole and will push you straight through if lined up correctly.

Don't be the Ghost of Robertsons by Tyler Goldstein

This is a message to any future keeners. It will take you through the steps of how to wash your own dishes. This session in Robertson there seems to be a ghost putting dirty Nutella bowls and other uncleaned dishes in the sink. So to step any future keeners from becoming the ghost of Robertson in years to come. I will make this simple. Step 1: You walk into the kitchen and grab your snack of choice. Let’s say a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Step 2: You make and eat your pb and j and make a mess all over your plate. Step 3: Two years living with other teenagers at at a boarding school has taught me this is where people fall to the darkside. Instead of putting it in the fridge for a fellow cabin mate to clean, you grab a sponge, put some soap on it, and scrub the dish until it is clean. Step 4: You dry the dish and place it back where it came from. Sent from my iPhone

The Rich Get Richer by Jackson Gratz

We all know the struggles of Keenerville, limited food, shared rooms, and so much more. One cabin however is exempt from our hardships, Yakistan. Yakistan, the only cabin where everyone gets their own room, Yakistan, who gets 1kg of Nutella for 3 people when we feed 10, Yakistan, who is late to every activity, and still has no push-ups. It’s hard not to grasp the disparities, and it gets worse. Last night, we discovered the incredible abundance of eating utensils contained in the cabinets of their cabin. While we in Robertsons only had three forks and were forced to eat with our hands, Yakistan had TWENTY SEVEN! While the rest of us are living in abject squalor, Yakistan is enjoying their abundant resources. We need to defund Yakistan and appropriate utensils fairly.

Paradise by Bennett Whalen

Keeners is a kayakers paradise. It is three weeks of big white water and some of the best coaches you can get. It is vary including to everyone know mater how skillful you are. Everyone will help each other do their best and help if you swim. There are also so many amazing surf waves, and me coming from Alberta, I don’t usually get to go on such powerful waves. When you are off the wave the coaches will also be there to help you with things they think you should try and also will tell you what you can improve on from the last run. So with all that I think I have explained why keeners is a kayakers paradise.

Animal House by Eli Knights

Don't leave your protein bars lying out in the open. This is a lesson we learnt very quickly living in Istambul or should I say the animal house. On the very first day of Keeners we left our cabin for less than an hour and came back to find that something had nibbled away at Jacob's protein bar. This continued with the creature even eating through a plastic bag and a wrapper to get at the bars. We found out who the food thief was when one day we came back and saw two squirrels that quickly ran under our beds. After the squirrels had left the cabin we searched the cabin for where they were getting in and found a sizable gap under the logs next to the door. To stop any squirrels from returning for a midnight snack a spare sheet was shoved into the gap and taped in there. However, squirrels aren't the only problem we face in Istambul. With a gappy door mosquitos love finding their way into our room to eat us when we try to sleep. We've resorted to putting bug spray in our hair or just covering ourselves in it to avoid being devoured. All in all I've learnt that staying in Istambul is a challenge of its own and you're sharing your room with a myriad of other critters.

Beatdown of the Century by Jacob Zivony

I was expecting a lot to happen when I came to keeners but one thing that wasn’t in the cards for me was a beatdown so bad that the beat downee was under water for more then 25 seconds. When we first set up to run iron ring I was expecting maybe a swim but what I wasn’t expecting was someone to go in the curtain of green water and get plunged 50 feet deep below the turbulent whirlpools and touch the bottom. When Callan first did her run I was super hyped at first because she was getting beatdown in the more traditional sense and she was fighting it, which was sick. When the room of doom decided to push her in to the curtain things took a very different turn. I was setting safety and I had my rope but she wasn’t looking so I didn’t throw it. Little did I know neither of us were gonna see each other for a while 25 seconds while she was under the water getting sucked down. When she popped up more then 100 feet down from iron ring all of us were shocked. She popped up holding her paddle and started swimming like nothing happened. That beatdown definitely takes the cake for the biggest beatdown I have ever seen in person or on video. If you ever plan on running iron ring at 11 and 1/2 on the gauge then you should be prepared to take a VERY VERY deep and long swim.