Ballin on a budget(nutritional edition) by Ben Giersch

Ballin on a budget(nutritional edition)

If you are the average kayaker, you are always looking for an easy way to save a penny or two. Even if you are interested in ballin off the river, then you have clicked on the right link. Food is an essential part of basic human life. Maintaining the consistent use of each food group can be a challenge if shredding is the only thing on your mind. Luckily for you, the thinking has already been done for you. My name is Ben and I’m here to introduce you to my list of easy but “nutritional”, that allow you to BALL ON A BUDGET!!!
Remember, the cook must always eat last.

Pluggers
-1)So for this fantastic meal, you will need a few ingredients. You will need a sleeve of salami, some bagels, and a steady bucket of cream cheese depending on the family of paddlers you will be providing for.
-2) you are gonna start by taking a nice stout bagel and splitting it in two. You are then going to want to take a river knife or other utensil to scoop up a glob of the cream.
-3) then in a circular counter-clockwise motion, you are going to want to spread your cream cheese evenly throughout the entirety of one side of the bagel.
-4) next you will want to unsheathe your salami from its sleeve, however, you may keep the sleeve on for no added nutritional value. You will then want to make nice even thick slices of salami. You will place exactly three and only three slices on the bagel as to preserve the rest of the arm for others. Each slice should be equally distanced from one another and from the center of the bagel.
-5) finally you will want to place the naked half of your bagel on the lathered end and provide equal pressure on all sections of the bagel.
-6) you will then hand it to your best mate and start on the next plugger.

This particular meal excelled in many categories of efficiency. It is a fast meal to prepare, it takes minimal effort, and also allows the cook to distribute serving sizes as he or she pleases. While providing a fantastic source of protein, grains, and dairy, it also does exactly what it is named after. Pluggers are designed by fine engineers to allow a paddler to go long distances while being able to maintain calm and semi-steady bowels. Pretty much every component is genetically modified to expand and create a challenge for your digestive system. This food also provides a lot of calories as well as stored energy.

Breakfast burritos (protein in a sock)
-1) for this meal you will need a larger assortment of foods. You will need shredded beef (sausage), eggs, tortillas, rice, shredded cheese and finally a big old bag of tortillas for your exterior. You may also use vegetables, however, it is not often encouraged.
-2) you are then going to grab a large cup or container for beating your eggs, however, you may also use carton egg (pre-beat eggs). You will then beat your eggs in your container and then pour into your preheated pan. Then place your burner on a medium flame, for an even cook. One may also mix milk into your eggs, however, if almond milk is added to the mix then you have ruined your meal. Scientific studies show that you are not human if you put almond milk in your eggs.
-4) next you are going to heat up your sausage in a separate pan while also placing the stove on a medium flame setting. You may also slice up a sausage if it is not already ground up. Get that going on the pan and go back to your eggs.
-5) you are going to want to cook your eggs until it is no longer runny or of a liquid state. You are then going to want to scramble your eggs by taking a spatula and just mashing it up. Then cook your sausage until it begins to defrost or just become warm and sizzle. You want a nice crispy texture, but not too crispy.
-6) you are then going to get a large boiling pot to get your rice going. Fill the pot up with water and place the rice in. For this pot however you are encouraged to set the flame up a little higher. Again this is all depending on how much time you have and how many people you must serve.
-7) once your rice is soft and ready to go remove the pot from the stove. Wait for the water to cool down for as long as you prefer before draining the water for maximum safety. It is encouraged to use some caliber of strainer weather it is a metal mesh material or just a plain shirt.
-8) grab a limp tortilla, you do not want a stale tortilla. First, take your eggs and spread it in a line across the center of the tortilla. Then place some shredded cheese over the eggs. Then place your sausage on top of the cheese as to sandwich the cheese nicely between the eggs and sausage creating a melting sensation. Then place some more shredded cheese on top and let it melt. Finally pack it all together and enjoy.

You are left with a steady meal packed with loads of protein and calories, good essentials for on water energy. This meal, however, is not to be consumed at enormous rates every day as to avoid packing in that cholesterol. Now you can wake up in the morning to a mix of different textures and protein.

HOW TO LEARN NEW TRICKS

By: Ben Atherton 

Learning new tricks can seem like a daunting task. Between finding practice time and getting instruction it may take much longer and be much harder than expected. But, with a few simple tips and tricks it’s very easy. Here’s a few simple steps for improving current and learning new tricks.

Step 1- Make a Plan

• Always plan out what you want to accomplish and when. This will help you stay on track for your goal. 
• Decide when you will practice and for how long. 

Step 2- Learn the basics

• Obviously learning a trick is near impossible without instruction, so get help from a professional. 
• Figure out the movements and initiations for the trick. 
• Watch others perform the move
• Never be afraid to ask for help!

Step 3- Practice, Practice, Practice 

• Set aside time and practice every time   without exceptions
• Try to actively work on skills even when it’s easier to just go paddle
• It may be more fun to just use the skills you know but keep at it and you should reach your goal. 

Step 4- Perfect your skills

• With practice you should be able to dial in your newly learned trick and show it off to your friends!

In conclusion, learning new tricks can be frustrating, boring, repetitive, and painful, but when following a strict regiment and keeping track of your goals, it’s a smooth and rewarding process. 

Should you be scared of holes on the river? Sam Sharp

BLOG~~~~~Should you be scared of holes in the river? It depends on the hole some holes are chill and some can be deadly. But in the end you should not be scared of every single hole on the river. The main reason why people are scared of holes is because they had one nasty beat down but you should not stop that from letting you from getting some awesome tricks or getting the best side serf.  And it is really good to get comfortable in holes and put your self in a hole and learn how to control it. Just Incase you happen to be looking at a pretty bird when you are in a rapid and you get in to a bad hole. You need to know how to get out of the hole and how to control it. The best way to not get hurt in a hole, is to always be relaxed in the hole and never be loose and have your arms every where you want to keep them tight you want to do this so you can prevent dislocated shoulders and other shoulder injuries and you will also have better control in the hole. But in the end holes are one of the best features on the river and you should go for those sick holes and always be safe.

And for anything you always want to be comfortable in punching through holes even creeks can have some pretty nasty holes so you want to get comfortable with that. But in the end you should always be safe and nervous not scared. 

How to make it seem like you know more than a roll. - Tanner Tito

Hi my name is Tanner Tito and I am going to a white water camp for play boating and know absolutely nothing about play boating! Everyone at camp already knew a whole bunch of awesome tricks that I had no idea how to do. At this moment I knew I had to make it seem as if I knew more than a roll. 

Steps of what to do and not to do when pretending like you know more than you really do:

1. Have a great poker face! 
2. If you accidentally do something that looks cool act like you did it on purpose! 
3. Don’t tell anyone that you only have a roll. 
4. Low key on the side ask the coaches for help to learn some tricks.
5. The fifth and final rule don’t put on a piece of paper that you low key don’t know how to roll cause everyone there already know you don’t.

In conclusion you’re best bet embrace your fate that you can only roll and learn everything you can in three weeks! But whether or not you know more than or if you just have have a roll you will have so much fun at Keeners camp!! 

How/Why you should learn the flat water blunt by TJ(Thomas Jenkins)

First, why should you learn how to move one on flat water? Well, a lot of play boating is muscle memory and you get muscle memory from repetition. Like you always hear “the more you do it, the better you get”. With that in mind, if you only practiced a move in a surf you wouldn’t get as many reps as one who practices on flat water. Another thing is on flat water you have more control and less to think about on than on the wave so you can focus on the move and not when and where you should hit the move. That’s why you should learn to do a flat water blunt. Now, let's get to the how’s to.

Step one: Get some speed. Speed is your friend; it helps give you the feel of being on a wave. Step two: edge left or right depend on which way you are trying to blunt but for sake of explanation we are hitting a right blunt. So get some speed and edge to the left. Step three: do your initiation stroke (forward stroke on the side you are edging). Step four: do a quick edge transfer from your left edge to your right edge. Note when you hit a blunt you always want to be looking upstream, look where you want to go and on a wave, you want to go upstream. 

**After you get some speed you edge to your left you do your initiation stroke do a quick edge transfer the **

 Step five: do a backstroke to help pull you around and stick the blunt. Congrats! If you have successfully followed these five step you should have done a flat water blunt. With your new flat water blunt, you can really get your form down and know the motion so when your on a wave trying to hit a blunt the movement feels natural. 

-thank you for reading I hope this was helpful and you are on your way to super sick air blunts

Making the Perfect Pancake | Cat Hardman

There are probably a million types of pancakes in the world, but one is always a favorite; the chocolate chip pancake. For many years, people have made chocolate chip pancakes, therefore one would think it would be as simple as it sounds. Well, that’s where you are wrong, but that is okay because I am going to teach you how to make perfect chocolate chip pancakes. Enjoy! 

Step 1:

Gather the special ingredients. Please get pancake mix, chocolate chips, you can either use milk or water; but I will be using milk.  After that, you need some butter, peanut butter, a bowl, and a pan. Then last, but not least “Some sugar and spice and everything nice” (The Powerpuff girls 1998). 

Step 2:

Grab the bowl and pour pancake mix into it. Then take your milk and pour some in, you can add a little more milk than you think because the powder will soak up most of the milk. After you add both ingredients to the bowl, start to stir until you get the consistency of yogurt. If you don’t have this consistency, you either added to much milk or not enough, if that is the case you can add more powder or milk. Once you get the consistency of yogurt, pour chocolate chips into the substance. You can add as many as you want, it is all personal preference, but when I cook them, a boatload of chocolate chips is added. Last part of this step is to stir the chocolate chips. 

Step 3:

Now you want to grab a pan and put it on the burner on the stove.  Next, you want to turn on the stove to between level 3 and 6.  Then take some butter and slice of a piece into the pan and let it slide around. Once the butter is melted, it is your time to shine. Take your bowl of pancake mix and pour about a cup and a half to a cup into your pan. After this, get a spatula and wait for about a minute depending on what level the stove is on. Now, you may be asking, how do I know when I should flip the pancake? Well, that’s a great question, so read step 4. 

Step 4:

Now you have put your pancake in the pan and you wondering when it is the right time to flip it. Well, my friends, let me tell you. After it has been about a minute or so, check to see if the sides of the pancake are starting to flare up and look a little more 3-D, that is a perfect time. You want to take your spatula and slowly slide it under the pancake, and then if you can fit your spatula under the pancake, it is good to send on the flip. Note though, if you slide your spatula under the pancake and it's gooey, remove the spatula slowly and wait a little longer. 

Step 5:

Congrats, you are almost done with your perfect pancake. Step 5 is one of the more crucial steps because you have flipped over your pancake and you are waiting for it to cook on the other side. Again, you should wait about a minute or so before checking if it is fully cooked. Once you think it is fully cooked, repeat step 4 by sliding your spatula under the pancake. After you do this, and you know it is fully cooked on both sides, flip it over a couple times to add some color to the front and back.

Step 6:

Now that your pancake is cooked, take it out of the pan and onto a plate. After this, turn off the stove and move the pan to a different burner. Next what you want to grab your jar of peanut butter and smother your pancake in it. Once this is completed, you need to get a knife and fork. Next, move to step 7. 

Step 7:

I will be honest with you, step 7 is the hardest! Though it is simple, all you must do is sit down and enjoy the bomb pancake you just made. Yes, I know, very difficult, but I have faith in you to do it and complete your task of making a bomb chocolate chip pancake. 

Thank you and enjoy,

Cat H.

How to play in whirlpools by: Joe Bowers

While at Keeners you might get the opportunity to kayak and swim in whirlpools. Most of the time whirlpools are fun things to mess around in but if you're not careful and break some of the keener whirlpool rules you might get hurt. Now here are the Keener whirlpool rules:

1. Only one person allowed in a whirlpool at a time.
2. If you are swimming in a whirlpool at higher water levels two life jackets may be required.
3. If you are swimming never go into the same whirlpool as a kayak or you might get bonked in the head.
4. If the water level is super high and the coaches say don't swim into the whirlpools, DON'T GO INTO THE WHIRLPOOLS. (At higher levels the sea monsters get angry when you're swimming in the whirlpools)
5. Sometimes the coaches will tie a rope around you and then pull you out if the water is super high and if there is a chance that you might hit a convergence.
6. This is the most important rule. Always listen to the Keener coaches they know what they are doing and will keep you safe as long as you follow their instruction.