How to win eternal glory (red ribbon) - Jacob Fulford

Now I know many of you who are reading this blog don’t know what the red ribbon is, so let me fill you in. At keeners you win different colored ribbons for different achievements. Gold ribbon for winning competition Friday, blue ribbon for best blog, green ribbon for best speech, pink ribbon for winning race day and red ribbon for winning Big Water Beat Down Thursday. Ribbons mark accomplishments that you can then attach to your gear to show off to everyone one the river.

Now that you are somewhat filled in I can elaborate on the more important part, HOW TO WIN ENTERNAL GLORY!!!!!!!!!!

Step #1: find something that intimidates you and then throw your self into it

What intimidates you will probably be different from what intimidates someone else. But if you want the get the red ribbon you have throw your self into the burliest biggest badest hole.

Step #2: keep moving.

When you’re in the hole you have to keep moving, keep paddling to stay in the center and try not to drift off the sides to much. If you find that you’ve been upright and in control for to long, it’s a good idea to throw in a couple up stream braces to initiate some tumbling

Step #3: You MUST want it

To have a fighting chance at winning the red ribbon or having a honourable mention you must want it, you have to eat, sleep and breath getting trashed. You have to paddle back into the hole no matter what.

Now if you follow these 3 easy steps you could be like me next Thursday.

Optional Qualifications that help:

Be able to hold your breath for an absurd amount of time (last year I broke a keener record with 1m47s)

Own hand paddles (they add style points while giving you a tad bit more control)

Get hit by a raft (I'm semi seriously but really don’t they hurt a lot(you didn’t hear it from me))

Get someone to record it (having it on video will then make it official and then people will know forsure that your deserving the ribbon)

THINGS TO NOT DO:

Swim – swimming highly reduces your chance at winning a red ribbon, if you feel out of breath just push threw until your back up right then surf/spin out

Be in control – yes being in control is generally a good thing with your in a gnarly hole but on Thursday’s it wont help you at all you want the get thrashed and be out of control while staying in the hole, it really an art in my opinion, getting a good beat down is rather majestic and rare, like a unicorn

Now if you’ve read this far down I must say thank you and I hope that my blog has been helpful. And if you are doubting what I’ve said I should let you know I'm a two time red ribbon winner and these steps have been proven to work

Big Water Beat Downs and Chemical Burns by Rose Menominee

Hey readers! Rose here, I'm sixteen, this is my first time at keeners and oh boy am I sore. I had my first Big Water Beat down Thursday last week and I was more than a little bit scared. My mum always told me: "Don't go down Phil's hole or you will die." (I suggest you read that in a stern mom voice so you can get the full experience.) So naturally I was more than a little bit scared when the coaches told us we were running McCoys on Thursday. despite my immense fear I was able to convince myself that running that section of river would make me a better paddler as well as give me more confidence when paddling big water. I only did two lines, both times trying to catch Phil's tongue, unfortunately I missed both times. The first time I was way to far left and got beat down in left side Phil's, the second time however things were going pretty good but I then realized I was too far right.  I ended up surfing right side Phil's, which was super cool, although for most of my surf I was more than a little confused, I hadn't expect to surf anything at all let alone right side Phil's. My mother would have killed me.

I had first aid over the weekend which was pretty good, I thought I learned a lot. However right after first aid ended I went back to my cabin only to spill toilet bowl cleaner on my self, I then read the package and found the scary skeletal hand symbol that meant the product can corrode or burn you. I completely forgot everything I was told and jumped into the shower. Luckily that was the correct thing to do and I was spared a nasty chemical burn.

Until next time,

Rose

Practicing throw ropes in SRT yesterday

England comes to the Ottawa river - Daniel Whiteley

Today was the first big water Thursday of this oks keener session. It was really cool to run the McCoys rapid again with everyone in the group because it helps teach you different lines and which lines are the best. Seeing everyone do the lines then say how it was can really build confidence because you know after watching them and listening to them, it shows that no matter how big the rapids look, it's all safe and anyone can run all the possible lines. the lines are all really awesome in such different ways, like the line that goes though the middle of phils hole which is a big hole in the middle of the rapid and is really safe if you get it right. All you need to do is be at the peak of the wave in front of phils hole called the marker wave becasuse it marks which line you're taking through the hole. Then paddle quite hard straight forwards to get it perfect. The other safe way though phils is to go hard right of the of the hole to sneak past nicely. you can surf either right or left side of the hole to get either a really good surf or possibly take a beatdown and it might push you out. The only thing about phils hole is you have to be really confident to be able to control the boat and try not to have a beat down unless you really want a beatdown because it's big water Thursday.
One really safe line is the one i took on my first run which is through the top hole on the left side of the rapid called satlers hole. To play it safe you go through the middle of satlers and there's a tongue which pushes you straight out but slightly to the left and in to the eddy at  river left. From here you can go to an eddy just below phils which is called safety eddy because from this is a very safe place to be no matter where you want to go downstream.
After we had finished paddling and had came back from dinner we used a slack line and it was my first time on one, it's like a tight rope but a couple inches wider and also way more bouncy. I guess i still need a little more practice but it's a lot fun even though it's super difficult.